A Conversation With An Anti-Tablist

“Tables aren’t real.”

“What are you talking about? I have a table right here in my house.”

“No, you don’t. A table is only a construct.”

“Yeah, somebody made it. That doesn’t mean it’s not real.”

“No. The idea of a table is just a construct. Can you even define a table?”

“Sure, it’s an object with four legs and a flat surface that you put things on.”

“What about those things underneath it? What are those?”

“Those are chairs.”

“Don’t those have four legs and a flat surface?”

“Uh, yeah, but I sit on those. I don’t put things on them.”

“You put yourself on them.”

“So? They’re still chairs.”

“I just proved to you that they’re the same as the table and you still deny the truth. What about that thing over there?”

“That’s my couch.”

“That has four legs and a flat surface too. Do you ever put things on that?”


“Well then, if your couch can be a table then how can a table even be a valid concept? Tables aren’t real.”

“My couch isn’t a table. They aren’t the same.”

“Yes they are the same. I just showed you how they are equal. Why can’t you accept the truth? You’re obviously just a tablist.”

“A tablist?! What the hell are you talking about?”

“You believe in the concept of a table. Therefore, you are a tablist.”

“So what? There’s nothing wrong with believing in tables. Why wouldn’t I believe in something that I know is real?”

“The real question is, ‘Why would you cling to a false concept that I already showed to be untrue?’ Why can’t you just admit that there’s no difference between a table, a chair and a couch? You just believe in tables because it brings comfort to your simple mind. If you were more enlightened then you would see the truth.”

“Are you retarded? A table, a chair and a couch aren’t the same! Why are you even arguing this with me?”

“Ah, yes. Now we start with the insults. I knew it wouldn’t take long for a tablist like you to resort to such tactics. Proof that you are losing the argument.”

“What argument? You’ve come here insisting that tables aren’t real, when I know that they’re real. I can see one right there!”

“What you are seeing are the differences. Why can’t you see the similarities? Why are you so hung up on such superficiality? Does it make you feel superior?”

“I’m going to punch you in the face.”

“See? It’s just like a tablist to act irrationally and violently. That’s why I’m trying to build a better world, where we don’t see distinctions. What does it even matter if something is a table or a chair or a couch? Why do you have to put labels on things? Labeling only leads to discrimination.”

“I’m not having this stupid conversation with you anymore. ”

“Hmmph! See, you start losing the debate, then you want to end it. Typical tablist. You are all the same. You can’t handle the truth.”

The anti-tablist then goes on his blog and brags about how he pwned a tablist today.


8 thoughts on “A Conversation With An Anti-Tablist

  1. Has anyone tried GW’s blog lately?

    Yeah, he made it private. I emailed him asking for permission to view his site, but he never responded. I think he wants to bury that part of his life. Maybe he found himself a beautiful mestizo girl from the Yucatan and had a change of heart. Who knows?

  2. Sagat-

    GW was married. I figure he was just getting burnt out. Though I’ve wondered if I may have played a small secondary role. He quit about a month after I raped emanuel appel, charlie weinblatt, etal. That’s one of the funniest and most enjoyable exchanges I’ve had on the internet. 🙂

  3. What about “deskists”. I’m a deskist.

    Of course, it all makes sense now. I should’ve known all along that you were were one of those rotten deskists!

  4. I typed the same username and email that I always used on his blog and it didn’t let me in. I never had an actual wordpress account until this year. So I guess I’m locked out of it, too.

  5. Since we’re talking about this, I wonder what made Ian Jobling throw in the towel. He did fought a good fight, it was sad to see the curtain fall.

    The website (whiteamerica.us) is still up, though, apparently indefinitely.

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